Tuesday, June 21, 2011

I think I need a Paralyze Heal you're so stunning.

Quick story; a couple of months ago this kid added me on facebook. I didn't know exactly who he was, but we had quite a few mutual friends, and he seemed nice, so I accepted his friend request. No big deal.

So tonight, I'm online facebook minding my own business, listening to HeyKelsey on YouTube, and this kid, who never talked to me sends me a message asking if we went to the same school. I was thinking that yes, I'm sure we did. You were the one that added me, shouldn't you know? But then again, I suppose I did accept his request so I am at fault for this entire predicament as well. He then replies "o well i thot u looked familiar and beautiful thats y i added u." Exactly like that, I copied and pasted it. I couldn't make this crap up if I tried. But anyway, that's just freaking lovely. My friends do tell me my profile picture is misleading, but really now.

Then, he wanted to play the question game. First question: what's your number?
Obviously I'm very wary of this guy, and I don't easily give out my number. I'm wasn't trying to be a tease with him, I just won't give you my number unless I know you. So I suggest we just play it on facebook. Next question is if I do drugs. He doesn't want to get involved in drugs again, and I don't do them. I knew I should have lied about that so I could end the crap before it started. A kid who I probably have never talked to in real life sending me messages such as:
"no u are still sexy to me and if you thank u are sexy the fuck wat evrybody says"
"...whats your number and we will trade pics :) ... u still look sexy so now i want u to see an recent pic of me.." (that recent pic turned out to be a shirtless picture of him in front of the mirror taken with his cell phone. If that doesn't scream douche, I don't know what does)
"Um do u thank u could send me a pic caus i want to put a fine body to your beautiful name"
"um your favoret part about a guy?" when I asked him "favoret" part of a girl, his response was "Well the body(which u have a smoken hot one) and how she carrys herself"
And you said you graduated high school. Silly boy, graduated my arse with that spelling. After he questioned my virginity, I was tempted to send him "Hi, I'm Chris Hansen from Dateline NBC. Why don't you have a seat over there?"

Moral of the story: don't send a girl a shirtless pic of youself that you took in the mirror. It just makes you seem more like a douchebag than you already are. Especially if you've never talked to this girl in real life and online for only 20 minutes. Cheesy pick up lines work so much better.

I also seem to attract losers.

Hopefully it rains today. I can't wait until winter, I'm getting sick of all this hot weather.

2 comments:

Natalie said...

Uhhhmmm yeah, that guy is obviously super duper sketchy. And he sounds like a real skeezeball. Asking for pictures of your body? If that wasn't disgusting enough his spelling is just thirty seven times more atrocious. DE-FRIENDED.

Kassandrah said...

oh my god. :/
this reminds me of my across the street neighbour that hits on me even know he knows i have a boyfriend.
But yeah, that guy definitely sounds sketchy. D: