Wednesday, August 8, 2012

"I'm done, really, everything is so "cool" now. I just want it all to stop. I mean, nobody talks about anything anymore. They just regurgitate everything they see on TV, or hear on the radio or watch on the web. When was the last time you had a real conversation with someone without somebody texting or looking at a screen or a monitor over your head? You know, a conversation about something that wasn't celebrities, gossip, sports, or pop politics. You know, something important, something personal."

I've been 18 for more than a month. The biggest change I have faced so far: My phone can be used for things other than social networking sites and Angry Birds. Such as, an actual phone.

I have less than three weeks of summer left. Unfortunately, most of it has been spent on Tumblr and YouTube. Soon I will be up at college making choices for myself, not trying to please anyone else. One of my biggest decisions (which I hope won't turn into a regret), is not auditioning for the orchestra. I still want to play, but I want it to be fun. I don't want to feel pressured doing something I love to do, and that's how I've felt all summer. I've practiced every day trying to perfect the audition excerpts. If it takes me that long, how am I going to survive the school year figuring out the music while studying for my classes? I don't regret working on them, though. I have definitely improved. Playing this up to tempo has not been a lot of fun. Playing this has.

I've been talking to a really nice boy. He has unknowingly helped me through a lot this summer.

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