Sunday, March 22, 2009

Love Will Come Through

I made this post on my old blog, which I was reading through some of yesterday. I love this post, one of my favorites that I did:

"It's been a month...A whole month...

He still hasn't said anything. No indication if he noticed it or not. It's more likely not though....

I hate that feeling like you're in the dark, and you don't know what's going on. You don't know what to feel, or if you should even feel anything at all. You want to care for that special person, but at the same time you don't want to waste your time on someone you're not sure would ever care for you and have the same feelings as you do for them.

There's times you feel like you need them that very second you start feeling even the tiniest bit of loneliness. But you know they will never be there to ease your pain. Not now, and probably not ever. But you still carry that little piece of hope in your heart, praying that one day, sometime soon, that he cares. But you don't want to wait any longer. And you can't.

Something is keeping you there with him, you don't know what, but something is telling you that he's hiding his true feelings. Or at least that's what you hope.

Caring for him may have caused you more damage than good, you soon realize. You've been waiting too long, and you've given up too much of your time trying to make him understand. To see that he's one of the only people you trust. You've somehow become numb. Nothing phases you anymore. You almost feel cold-hearted. But he's still one of the only people in your life you care about.

Love? For you it could possibly be. You can't leave him, and it's too hard for you to let him go. Would leaving him help you? Or would it just create more pain, and a bigger hole in your heart? There's only one way to find out..."

Yep, I love it. :)

I remember I was really pissed off that day, trying to understand him, wanting so badly to just tell him everything; that or give up. That really explains everything well, everything that was going on for the past year.

But the past is the past, and it's over.

I finally finished painting my room, so now I get to sleep in there tonight, it's pretty exciting. I had to sleep on the couch in the living room, which was not very comfortable, might I add. That probably explains the lack of sleep I've been having and the weird dreams. Well, I think the smell of the paint caused those. (;

I finally get to go back to school tomorrow, I can't wait.

:) <-- still happy, though not as much as yesterday. :)


Cursed♪♫ said...

Lovely pik!!!!!!!! :)

Cursed♪♫ said...

Really need to study so will comment again later ! Take Care :D

Karl said...

not even bothered to read it.


•bLue-eyed sOuL• said...

yaeh!!nice pik!!

grey~eyes said...

i think it is cool that you can look back on that an feel like it is over, its a cool thing to do :)

Yeah, i was feeling random when i wrote that, he is nice though, i went into town with him yesterday, and you know how sometimes things like that can be awkward, well it really wasnt, and i was pleased :)


Katherine said...

That's one of the reasons why I started blogging; to be able to write, then a few days, months, or even years later, I can just come back and see what I was feeling.
It's a neat thing :)


krl said...

iron and wine really arent that bad.

again, surprised i like them. my taste is definitely changing. possibly for the worse.


krl said...

haha good luck. youll need it.

go on



grey~eyes said...

oh my gosh, i love hellogoodbye, i have only just discovered them, they are really good. Do you like Vampire Weekend? They are rather cool too, bit less dancable sometimes, but pretty cool ;)


N a t a l i e. said...

I love being able to look back at what I was thinking way back when too ! Although my earliest posts weren't nearly as well-written as that one. They pretty much look like they were written by a little kid :P I've never been much good at writing seriously or inspiringly (not a word but you get the point), but you certainly are (:

Ooh! What color did you paint it? I've been having odd dreams lately too. Well, at least late night. It was so weird... I was going down a slide, and every time I went around another curve everything got bigger and bigger, until it was huge and I was so small that I fell down this obscure hole and was late to track practice. Haha, I don't know.

Have a great week! :D

grey~eyes said...

Gah, he seems to hate most remotley happy things. I have decided not to care. I love the wombats and im proud of it!
;) :D